Life is Good...enough

I sort of like the logo that is on T-shirts and hats and spare tire covers.. Life is Good. They are cute...there is usually a dog involved. But really it should just say, Life is Good Enough. Because sometimes life isn't that good...but it's good enough. Do we really have to go around acting so damn happy all the time? It's not normal.

For instance, I just turned 50. This is not particularly good news...but it's not the worst news ever, either. I could be 60. But the bitter pill of turning 50 was washed down with some good friends and vodka. The fact remains that the pill still was bitter, but I didn't really taste it going down. And that is good enough.

I'm still not overly happy about this age thing, but I am happy that I have some of the most awesome friends of all time. This includes some people that are actually related to me..but I'm putting them in the friend category for this. They took me to Nashville for my birthday. Nashville is the new Vegas as far as we are concerned. Cheaper, less hype, much less walking and way more hot guys who sing country songs to you. What's not to like about that? If you like country music...you should totally go there. If you don't, do not go...they have speakers on every street corner playing country tunes all the time. And every bar (and there are plenty of them) has live music playing around the clock. Really good, really talented musicians who are playing for tips. They are working their butts off trying to be somebody!

I do try to dwell on the positive and not the negative. This is a good example of that. I have been on the Earth for a pretty long time......sure....but In that time I have acquired a lot of really good, funny, smart and generous friends!!! Which reminds me....where are we going for my 60th??

Everybody's scared of something

I'm really not afraid of much. I'm not afraid of the cops.....I'm not breaking any laws, usually. I'm not afraid of terrorists....if they are gonna kill us all I hope I am in the first strike. I'm not afraid of people getting mad at me...I've had plenty of experience with that. But there is a group of people over in Salem that scare the crap out of me.

Every two years, the Oregon Board of Massage Therapists makes you renew your license. Simple, right? No big deal; all professions have their licensing requirements. I understand their need for my money so they can keep massage therapists on the up and up..I don't just get it ...I'm OK with it. But I have to confess that the OBMT scares me more than any group of people ever have. Seriously. It might be because of the practical test they administer which was the scariest hours of my life. It might be that I assume that they are completely lacking humor. It might be that they have the power to completely ruin my life. That last one is probably it, isn't it?

Anyway, I went online a couple weeks ago to renew my license by the appropriate date (and believe me when I tell you that that is not as clear-cut as you would think.) I submitted all of the classes that I took for the continuing education requirement and with each entry I actually thought, "I hope they like this one." Like I was some little kid making a card for my "mommy dearest" and praying that she would think I was "special." It's embarrassing the omnipotence I give these people.

Now you want to hear something completely stupid? I got my mail today and in the box was something from the OBMT. My heart fluttered. I was filled with dread. What if they didn't like my CEU's? What if I made a mistake? What if they are auditing me? What if they just decided for no reason that they don't want to renew my license and this is a 'cease and desist order.' I had all of these thoughts at once. So I brought the mail inside and opened up all the other things first. I had to ease into it. I got a rebate check for $7.00 from Castrol Oil. So far, so good. I got a notice from my credit union about some change they are making that I have no idea what it means. OK, all seems well. Then I opened it. And there before my very eyes was my new license that is good until March 2014. And I actually cried. I'm not joking. I teared-up. With relief. How stupid is that?

When I took the written tests to get my license initially, the computer I took the test on informed me that I passed and went out to my truck and cried really hard. It's the only time in my life that I cried over a test. Tests don't freak me out...I either know the stuff or I don't and I set my expectations for the grade accordingly. But this test was important. And I was so relieved I bawled like a little baby. I wonder what I would have done if I failed? I probably would have gotten mad.

It's the silliest things that get us.....that are important to us. It's not that I think I have done anything wrong to make the OBMT pull my license....not the case..I am following the rules to the letter! It's not that I think they are unfair and want to mess with me...I don't. I guess it's just that that little stupid piece of paper really means the world to me. Not because I think I sacrificed so much to get it. I did sacrifice some things...but willingly and certainly nothing huge in the great scheme of things. I'm really not sure why it's so important to me...but it is. So, thanks OBMT for not screwing with license # 15999 because I am not sure I could handle it!

A super hero for today

My favorite character is back for his new season on the Science Channel. That's right, Karl Pilkington. He's the funniest man (bloke) on TV. I seriously want this guy to be my new boyfriend because he makes me laugh more than anyone has in a while. Certainly, you have all watched An Idiot Abroad?? (I've written about it before.) Well now his new season is subtitled The Bucket List. The producers of the show come clean that it is not in fact Karl's bucket list....not sure what would be on his bucket list except to sit quietly somewhere with some potato chips (crisps) and have no one bother him. (Just that image alone makes me love the man.) Anyway, as much as I would love to tell you every funny thing that he says (I really would love that) I think that you might get bored...and honestly you should just tune into the show and hear it straight from his beautiful lips.... I do want to tell you about something that he said that resonated with me very much.

So Karl is on the Trans-Siberian train with a Russian guy who is magnetic. I mean that objects stick to him, like he is a human magnet. So Karl thinks this is not the most handy power to have and the camera man asks, "Well, what super powers would you want to have, then?" And Karl came up with the best answer of all. He would be "Bulls*** Man." He would wear regular clothing, no cape or anything and would swoop down when appropriate and call "bulls***" on people. His hope being that if he calls people on their bull**** they will eventually stop it. It's as if Karl can read my mind. This is my greatest hope for mankind.

This is the kind of thing that I run into all the time and I am pretty sure Karl and I are not alone. I realize that I am a bit odd. I don't ever quite fit in with people who do what I do. When I did mediation, I didn't fit in with the soft spoken, never-say-anything-to-offend-anyone-ever crowd. Now that I do massage and Reiki I don't fit in with the peace, love and granola crowd. And I know why....it's because I am able to spot bull**** when I hear it. Simple as that. Oh what a world (and a personal relief to me) to have Karl be Bulls*** Man so that I didn't have to do it! There have been plenty of times when I ended up being the bad guy because I called "bulls*** around people who tout the adage that we "all just need to love everybody." It's just not realistic! I'm not afraid to say it...but I inevitably get "that look" that says "oh, poor Lee...she just doesn't get it yet." And maybe I don't. But I do not see, anytime soon, a world where everyone should be trusted based on the words that come out of their mouths. I am weary of people who walk around acting like they are more evolved than the rest of us. Like they have it all figured out. No they don't! People who act like that are no better than the rest of us. And sometimes they are worse.

There's a word for people who trust everything everyone says...and that word is "sucker." Karl and I will not be suckers. Bulls*** Man to the rescue!!

You never know

As all my followers (heeheehee) may remember, I was a Juvenile Probation Officer for many years before I gave it all up to be a massage therapist. Some would say that that was a really stupid idea. And when I sit down to pay my bills I think those people were probably right. But I believe there is a shelf life to most things; relationships, friendships, jobs, cheese (I found a piece in the back of the fridge that had gone beyond that shelf life...not pretty.) And the shelf life of the Juvenile Department job had expired.

One of the frustrating things (let me emphasize "one") about that job was that you never knew if you were doing one bit of good. You seriously had to have faith that you were doing the right thing even if many people were yelling at you telling you that you were Satan and you should just go back to Hell where you belonged and leave their poor child alone...."He's a good boy!" But you didn't cave..you couldn't and you told yourself that someday they would thank you. Ha. Those somedays never come. And yet, the other day it was someday.

My new phone rang (I'll have to write another blog on how a new touch screen cell phone can ruin your life) and I saw that it was a call from California. Contrary to my regular habits, I answered it. It was a man's voice telling me his name and asking if I remembered him. After I made sure I heard the name right I said, "oh, I remember you!" Mac was a kid on my caseload waaaayyyy back in the day. He's in his 30's now (gulp) and he called me to buy a massage from me for his mom who still lives in town. He said he googles me every so often to see what I am up to and found my website. I asked him why he does that and he said, "because you were a good influence on me when I needed it." Gulp again. I was touched. He went on to tell me that he is a musician...a rapper, and that he just finished a European tour. Wow! When I hung up I went straight to the research library of google and typed in his professional name. He was everywhere. Lots of videos on Utube..and I watched them. And I cried. I was really proud of that kid! Mac always had lots of personality and he was cute....and it looks like he coupled that with some hard work and made something of himself. That's all any of us Juvenile PO's ever wanted!!

I was touched that Mac went out of his way to call me....it was risky. He'd feel like crap if I didn't remember him. He may never know how much his call touched my heart. If you read this blog, Mac....thank you for that!

So the lesson here is that you do what you do with good intentions and faith. We may never know how much we have influenced another person. We all touch each other more profoundly than we realize. It's a strong power that we have to use responsibly.

Unbelievable

As I have already confessed, I get much of my news from The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. I appreciate that they report the news in a way that doesn't make me want to kill myself..and that is with sarcasm and parody, which you have to admit helps you choke down the ridiculous pill that is the news. But just because they present news stories in a way that makes you laugh, doesn't mean they aren't true. I give you this story that was on last week:

There was a Congresswomen, Kathy Dahlkemper, who was trying to take a bill that she wrote and get it turned into a law. The bill gave discounts on health insurance premiums to people who exercise. Now that makes sense, yes? The Democrats liked it because it was preventative care. The Republicans liked it because of it's low cost. So why didn't the bill ever get made into a law? Who would try to squash this great idea? You might think that big tobacco or the fast food industry, right? Nope. It was the American Cancer Society, the American Lung Association and the American Diabetes Association. That's right. Take a minute to think about that. And not only did they each try hard to kill the bill, but they cooperated with each other to put pressure on the House to kill it.

Now, I ask you this question again (I asked it last October during breast cancer awareness month.) Do these public health charities really want to help us all be healthier or do they want to continue to rake in billions of dollars under the guise of teaching us how to make healthier lifestyle choices? What possible explanation is there for not wanting us to have monetary incentives to exercise? The truth is, of course, that they want us to be unhealthy. That way they can not only continue to collect money after a person dies when their families take "contributions to the American Diabetes Association in lieu of flowers." Or on education of us complete morons on how we can "prevent this disease." Or on "raising awareness" walks or campaigns where you pay them to walk "for the cause" and get some stupid color-coded ribbon to show how much you care. These organizations explained their position in this way; that some of the people they represent cannot make these lifestyle changes and they are simply sticking up for those folks. Are you kidding me? Everyone can do some kind of exercise. Even fully disabled quadriplegics could have help doing passive exercise with a physical or massage therapist. Everyone else can do something.

Now this Congresswoman no longer holds a seat. I don't know why, but I wonder. She said on the show that the charities mentioned contacted her when they discovered she was going to be on the show. But since she doesn't hold a seat anymore, they didn't have a way to threaten her I suppose, so she went ahead with it.

If you think that the public health charities give a rip about public health, then by all means, give them all your money. I am not going to give them one red cent.

I have some more information about some other folks that care not about our nation's health. I'll write about that later. I need to go take a walk!

Things I don't get

If you start saying things like, "that's what's wrong with this country!" or, "I just don't understand the young people of today," does that mean you are officially old? I think I know your answer, "YES!" And I am prepared to admit it openly. I am old. Because I find myself saying those two things a lot. The last time I said, " that's what's wrong with this country," was with my insurance lady and a gentleman of about 85. We were having a heated discussion about the unfair practices of insurance companies. I suggested that people should be allowed to purchase an accident policy.....meaning that if they get into an accident they are covered, but that's it. But, see, that'll never work because then the doctors won't have insurance money to give you all the tests they say you need so they can find something wrong with you! I also found out that a 16 year old girl who is going to high school is paying a much, much higher rate for her auto insurance than that same girl who has had a baby and dropped out of school. What?

Another time I said "that's what's wrong with this country" was the other day at part-time massage job (Yes, I work for myself..but I also work for a franchise to make ends meet.) I like this job...they get tons of clients and they mostly just let us do our jobs and then go home. It's close to perfect. But lately they have been trying to give us incentives. So, up on the board in the break room are some stats that represent how often a client re books with the therapist they just got a massage from. Yours truly was the top performer...by kind of a lot. But that's not the contest of course. The contest is who can raise that percentage of re bookings by 10%. (The prize is a free massage....a pretty good prize!) But how is that a good contest? It's a lot easier for the person who has like 2% to get up to 12% which won't even be close to half of what I am doing just because I do my best without any incentives! I mean, seriously.....that is what is wrong with our country! The folks who do a good job because they take pride in their work get nothing. The slackers wait for some carrot to be dangled in their face to get motivated. Ugh! It's everywhere and I am sick of it.

Forever I have held to the mantra that if you work hard and treat people right you will succeed in life. I have to admit that I think this view may be at the very least, naive and at the most outdated. Outdated....like me. Oh well...I'm probably too old to change.

"Fall is in the air"

Doesn't it feel like change is in the air? Although I always think I want it to be summer forever, I have to admit I like the feeling of the air in fall the best. It can be warm outside, but it will still have that feeling that no one ever seems to be able to describe beyond "fall is in the air." What is that feeling? It feels a little crisp and the light is a little clearer. Hmmmm, maybe the feeling is change. This time of year is always kind of exciting. Maybe that is a carry over from the days of returning to school. You were a little scared, but excited too...for whatever opportunities the new year was going to bring you. Maybe the excitement was over your new clothes and shoes...I don't know. But change is definitely in the air now.

One change for me is that the salon where I work out of is moving. Miranda bought a building in a really good location. And it is close to my house, so I am excited about that. I think once we get in there and settled it will be really good for business. I hope so. We all need some positive change...and that positive change needs to include the economy. I have grown tired of watching people struggle. It's taking it's toll on everyone.

What's the solution for this? I'm not sure. We can appreciate and focus on what we do have...not what we don't have. And notice the simple beauty that surrounds us...like the subtle change in the air. And notice all the funny things you see during a day that make you smile...like watching my dog slide down a grassy hill on his back.

Happy autumn everyone. Let us focus on the change and will it to be a good one!