Sunday, January 2, 2011

A new year

I don't know why people get excited about new years. I can understand being happy enough to say goodbye to a bad year, that I get. But I don't understand wanting to get hammered counting down the ball and all that. I am all for partying, God knows...every other day of the year...but New Year's Eve? It's "fraught with peril" as my old boss used to say...and there is a good chance of meeting up with way too many amateurs..especially on the roads. So, I never go out on New Year's eve. I cannot stand the thought of waking up with a hangover on the first day of the year. That would just be depressing. Again..any other day.....I'm fine with it.
So, for New Year's eve I made myself a delicious dinner and had some nice wine..and watched a movie. Dullsville, population me, I know. And for the first day of a new year that is full of promise and hope, I cleaned and fixed little things around the house..just to make me feel fresh; start things off on the right foot. I re-caulked the tub and cleaned the oven and fixed a towel rack that has been loose for about two years and bought two new pot holders. Because, you know....nothing says old and tired and worn out than nasty, burned, stained with God-knows-what potholders. This may sound pretty small, heck maybe downright pathetic but I like to at least try to bring a certain energy to the new year..that "life is what you make of it" energy...that "at least I am trying to make things better" energy. I am hoping that current will carry over into my business, of course....and my personal life. That energy that says I have the power and ability and will to make things the best I can make them. I am in control. I got this. I am not and will not be a victim of circumstance. I want to be a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little dirt clod of pain and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making me happy. (Don't you love that last line?? I read it somewhere..on the daily Buddha on Facebook I think. I loved it so much I wrote it down. Perfect!) My new year's resolution (I usually don't make one) is that things need to work for me this year. If they don't they are cut out. That can mean anything and everything; a relationship, a business practice....a logistical detail, whatever. If it ain't working for me I ain't doing it. Period. I am hoping that this tricks me into thinking I have any control over my world. But we all know the truth don't we?